Chapter 5

That afternoon, the once-clear sky suddenly darkened as heavy clouds gathered.
Su Xiaoxiao looked out the window, frowning. Don’t tell me it’s going to storm.
Sure enough, moments later, thunder rolled, and rain came pouring down in sheets.
As the school day neared its end, the hallways filled with parents waiting to pick up their children.
Su Xiaoxiao glanced around but didn’t see Grandma. A small pang of worry hit her.
The rain was heavy, the sky was dark, and Grandma Su was old, still riding that tricycle. What if something happened on the way?
When the final bell rang, Su Xiaoxiao was the first to rush out of class. She scanned the schoolyard until she spotted Grandma Su standing by the back gate, wrapped in a raincoat.
Even with the coat on, the rain had soaked her hair and sleeves.
When Grandma Su saw her, she hurriedly handed over the raincoat and boots for Su Xiaoxiao to put on.
The downpour was relentless, water already pooling into small streams along the ground.
As soon as they stepped outside the building, Grandma Su crouched down and said, “Come on, Grandma will carry you.”
Su Xiaoxiao blushed. “No, no, it’s fine, I can walk!”
She was young and strong, how could she possibly let an old lady carry her? If anything, she should be helping Grandma.
She’d momentarily forgotten that the body she inhabited was only eight or nine years old.
With surprising strength, Grandma Su grabbed her arm and hoisted her up onto her back.
Su Xiaoxiao clung gently to her neck. Despite the roaring rain and howling wind, a deep peace filled her chest.
Grandma Su set her down on the tricycle, pulled out a plastic bag to cover the seat, and made sure she was comfortable before pushing off into the rain.
From behind, Jin Qishan watched the scene unfold. A flicker of envy stirred in his chest.
He usually couldn’t stand Grandma Su, always meddling, always talking too much, but she was truly good to Su Xiaoxiao.
If only someone treated me like that, he thought.
One by one, students were picked up by their parents, until only Jin Qishan was left, walking alone through the rain.
The water reached halfway up his calves, making every step harder than the last.
Everyone had someone waiting for them, someone worrying about them, everyone except him.
He thought that if his own grandmother were still around, she would’ve been like Grandma Su too, unwilling to let him walk through the storm.
Back then, when she carried him on her back, he’d felt loved, like he mattered.
The memory stung. Tears welled up and mixed with the rain running down his face.
It’s just the rain, he told himself. The rain’s too heavy, that’s all.
He wiped his face with a trembling hand, trying to see clearly again.
Suddenly, a harsh screech of brakes split through the downpour.
A motorcycle burst out of the rain curtain, nearly hitting him.
The man riding it cursed viciously, “Are you f***ing blind? Trying to get yourself killed? Stay the hell out of my way, you damn jinx!”
Jin Qishan froze. He’d just been walking quietly along the road, how had it turned into his fault again?
What had he done wrong this time?
Why did everyone always treat him like this?
Why was he always the one blamed?
A hollow ache filled his chest. Maybe…maybe it would be better if he just died.
If he were gone, maybe then his grandparents, his father, maybe then they’d regret not believing him.
But if he really died, Grandma would be heartbroken, and he couldn’t bear to see her sad.
Children’s worlds are simple. When they love someone, they do so wholeheartedly; the person they love becomes their entire world.
And for Jin Qishan, his grandmother was his entire world.
In the nineties, the voltage wasn’t always stable, every time there was a big storm, the power would go out.
This time was no different.
Fortunately, Grandma Su had a few candles stored at home.
She lit one in the kitchen and another on the dining table, then went back to cooking. Grandpa Su sat at the table reading the newspaper, while little Su Xiaoxiao leaned over her homework.
When dinner was ready, Grandma Su called out, “Old man, clear the table, we’re eating.”
Su Xiaoxiao quickly stuffed her textbooks and homework into her schoolbag, washed her hands, and went to the kitchen to help serve the food.
As always, Grandma Su raised her voice: “Out, out, you don’t need to help.”
Her voice was naturally loud, and whatever she said usually went unquestioned. Su Xiaoxiao never argued, it always sounded like a quarrel, and she didn’t like that.
Normally, she would have left the kitchen right away. But today, she wanted to help.
“You child, I told you to get out. If you get your clothes dirty again, I’ll have to wash them.” Grandma Su dusted her hands on her apron and shooed the girl away. “Out, I said!”
Instead, Su Xiaoxiao took six bowls from the cabinet, handed three to her grandmother, and said, “Grandma, you pour the soup, I’ll scoop the rice.”
The word “Grandma” made the old woman pause for two seconds before she took the bowls and said, “Oh, alright.”
Su Xiaoxiao opened the rice cooker. In the flickering candlelight, she noticed little dark round specks on top of the white rice.
“There’s something on the rice,” she said.
Grandma Su chuckled, thinking the girl didn’t recognize green beans.
“That’s for your grandpa,” she explained. “Scoop those into his bowl.”
“Okay.” Su Xiaoxiao moved all the beans into Grandpa’s bowl and added two spoonfuls of rice. “Grandpa likes green beans?”
“He doesn’t like plain rice. Green beans are good for his high blood pressure, so I mix some in,” Grandma said.
“Oh.” Su Xiaoxiao asked, “You’ve always done that?”
“Of course. Every meal. If not green beans, then red beans, sometimes something else.” Seeing the girl’s curiosity, Grandma Su added, “You don’t like them, so I never give you any. That’s why you didn’t know.”
Su Xiaoxiao was quietly stunned.
Grandma Su could be rather domineering and often scolded Grandpa at home, but in the small things, she cared for him so attentively.
In truth, she cared for everyone that way.
Su Xiaoxiao didn’t like corn porridge, but her grandparents did, so every meal, there were always two kinds of porridge, and no one had to compromise.
When the food was ready, Grandma Su picked up the candle from the kitchen, intending to bring it to the dining room.
Suddenly, a sharp scream came from the hallway outside: “Ahhh!”
Still holding the candle, Grandma Su hurried out.
Su Xiaoxiao quickly followed.
The faint light from the candle illuminated the stairwell.
Grandma Su saw Li Yue from the fourth floor standing by their door. “Xiao Li, what’s wrong?” she asked.
Li Yue clutched her chest, rain dripping down her forehead and along her cheeks. “Scared me half to death! I just got off work, and Jin Qishan was crouched on the stairs, nearly gave me a heart attack!”
She continued, “I mean really, pitch dark, and suddenly there’s someone crouching there. Who wouldn’t be terrified?”
Grandma Su blinked rapidly and said, “Yes, yes, I know. Don’t hold it against the kid, go on home and eat.”
“Aunt Tian, I’ll go then. You should head back too.” Li Yue glanced twice more at Jin Qishan, rolled her eyes, and went upstairs.
Peeking from behind Grandma Su, Su Xiaoxiao saw Jin Qishan sitting by their door, arms wrapped around his knees, head buried against them, as if he hadn’t heard a word of what was being said.
Grandma Su nudged him. “Why are you sitting here again? Forgot your keys?”
The moment she touched him, she froze, his skin was burning hot.
“Xiaoxiao, hold the candle,” she said, passing it to the girl before lifting the boy up.
Jin Qishan’s whole body was limp, his head drooping helplessly, which gave Grandma Su quite a fright.
“Xiaoxiao, quick, get your grandpa!” she shouted.
Ignoring his soaked clothes, she let him lean against her shoulder. Together, she and Grandpa Su managed to carry him to the couch.
Feeling his forehead, Grandma Su said, “He’s burning up! Must have a fever.”
Grandpa Su touched him too, then hurried to fetch a thermometer.
Grandma Su tucked it under the boy’s arm. “His clothes are drenched. I’ll get a blanket, you take his shirt off.”
But as Grandpa Su reached to unbutton the shirt, Jin Qishan suddenly opened his eyes, staring at him warily.
“You’re soaked,” Grandpa said gently. “Change out of it before you catch a cold.”
Jin Qishan pulled his collar tight and lowered his head. “No need.”
Grandma Su came back out. “What do you mean no need? Your clothes are dripping wet! You kids never listen, do you think getting sick is fun?”
The boy stayed silent.
When she reached to help him, he clutched his clothes tightly, refusing to let anyone near.
Irritated, Grandma Su tossed the blanket over him. “Fine, suit yourself,” she muttered. “Not my kid anyway.”
After three or four minutes, Grandpa Su checked the thermometer.
The candlelight flickered, making it hard for him to read, so he passed it to Su Xiaoxiao.
“It’s 38.9 degrees,” she said.
Grandma Su immediately came over. “That high? Quick, do we have any fever medicine? Bring it here, fast!”
Grandpa Su went to get the fever medicine while Grandma Su poured some water. Together, they stood by and watched Jin Qishan swallow the pills.
Worried that Dong Xiaohong might come home and panic if she didn’t find her son, they left the Su family’s door open.
Grandma Su glanced toward the apartment across the hall. “Your mom’s not back yet?”
Jin Qishan said nothing.
“How about you eat with us, then? Dinner’s ready,” Grandma Su offered.
Still, the boy sat there, head lowered, silent as ever.
Grandma Su pursed her lips, clearly irritated. “Good grief! Talking to this kid could drive a person mad. If he were mine, I’d have given him a good spanking twice a day.”
“Don’t talk like that in front of the child,” Grandpa Su warned gently.
“I’ll say it right in front of him, what, I can’t scold a kid now?” Grandma Su planted her hands on her hips and glared at Jin Qishan. “Children these days are spoiled rotten. No manners whatsoever.”
“Look at me,” she continued, voice rising. “I never went to school a day in my life, and even I know when someone talks to you, you answer back! And this one’s supposed to be a student? Hah, not worth a damn. That Dong Xiaohong treats him so well, gave up her own child for him, and what does he do? Has he ever treated her like a mother? Nothing but an ungrateful brat.”
Seeing her grandmother so angry, Su Xiaoxiao quickly spoke up. “Grandma, Jin Qishan just doesn’t talk much. He’s actually very kind.”
Jin Qishan flinched slightly but kept his head down.