Chapter 77

Not hearing Xia Xi’s response on the other end, Luo Chu'an felt a sudden pang of panic. He couldn’t help but feel that he was no longer acting like himself, as if he had lost something important. Yet, he was powerless to prevent that loss, only able to watch helplessly as it slipped away. He pressed his lips together and attempted to cover up his true intentions, explaining, "Xia Xi, I’m sorry, that’s not what I meant. I called you hoping you could help me. Your performance in 'Cross-Border Singing Joy' has been excellent, and everyone has been praising you. All I’m asking is that when you face Lin Wei in the next round, you go a little easy on her so she can make it to the finals. If, if that could happen,"
"Are you treating me like a tool you can use at will again?" Xia Xi blinked, a flicker of mockery passing through her eyes. Her usually steady voice grew hoarse, cutting off Luo Chu'an's own hesitant words. Over the phone, Luo Chu'an could hear the heartbreak and sorrow in her tone. "So you want Lin Wei to advance, and for me to be eliminated?"
"No, that's not it, I don't mean that," Luo Chu'an quickly denied, flustered by the heartbreaking sound of Xia Xi's voice. He fell silent for a long moment before continuing, "Xia Xi, I'm sorry, but this time, can you help me one last time?"
"One last time again?" Xia Xi's voice gradually turned cold. "Luo Chu'an, you always make unreasonable demands of me. Last time, the time before that, and now you want me to deliberately draw Lin Wei in the individual match and lose to her, right? But do you even realize that if I lose to her, I'll still be eliminated? Your precious darling gets to advance, but what about me? What do my efforts even mean? Of course, to you, my efforts are nothing. How could I ever compare to Lin Wei, right?"
"But Luo Chu'an, Lin Wei is your treasure, while I'm just your obedient servant, am I? The maid you can summon and dismiss as you please? When have you ever kept the promises you made to me? Every time you seek me out, it's for Lin Wei, asking me to sacrifice something to protect your darling. Every time, you tell me it's the last time, that I should endure it just once more. I've endured over and over, standing in place, waiting for you to turn around and see the battered, wounded me, to see the one who's been silently waiting for you. How ridiculous, right? Is it because of this that you think I'll agree to any condition you set? Do you keep pushing your luck because you think I'm easy to bully? If that's what you believe, then let me tell you now, this time, I won't help you. The Xia Xi who used to obey your every word is gone. She died the moment you repeatedly made her do things she never wanted to do. I'm begging you, please don't disturb me anymore. Let me stop hearing about you, let me stop thinking of you. I've already forgotten you, I swear. Please."
"Xia Xi," Luo Chu'an's heart felt as if it had been sliced open, a sharp pain searing through him as he listened to her heart-wrenching words on the other end of the line. He felt lost, unsure of what was happening to him, and could only stare blankly at the potted plant on his desk. After a long pause, he spoke again, "I'm sorry."
But that "I'm sorry" would never reach Xia Xi's ears, nor did she need to hear it anymore. While Luo Chu'an was lost in his daze, Xia Xi had already hung up. The phone emitted a continuous, monotonous "beep, beep, beep,", a sound that should have been irritating, yet Luo Chu'an couldn't bring himself to put the receiver down. He was afraid.
Afraid that the moment he hung up, things between him and Xia Xi would be like this forever, with no way back to how they used to be.
How could it end like this?
Luo Chuan frowned in confusion, gazing quietly at the pot of flowers on his desk. It suddenly occurred to him that he had bought this plant with Xia Xi at the flower market. Back then, she had chattered nonstop, insisting he buy it, claiming it suited him perfectly. She wanted it placed in the most prominent spot on his desk so that every time he saw it, he would think of her.
Now, he missed her terribly, longing to see her, to talk to her again. But it seemed he had made another mistake, and he wondered if there was still a chance to make amends.
Luo Chuan suddenly felt as though he had made a wrong choice.

"Xia Xi, wh-what's wrong with you?" Just as Xia Xi had hung up on that infuriating Luo Chuan, Da He walked in and saw her murderous expression, involuntarily shuddering.
"Luo Chuan just called, telling me to choose to compete against Lin Wei and deliberately lose the match so she can advance. Hah." Xia Xi's tone was dripping with sarcasm.
"You didn't agree to him, did you?" Da He's voice carried a hint of urgency upon hearing this. Anxiously grabbing her arm, he hoped for an acceptable answer rather than bad news.
"Do you really think I'm that foolish in your eyes?" Seeing the doubt in Da He's eyes, Xia Xi felt a pang of hurt. She widened her eyes helplessly and looked at him. "I haven't lost my mind. Why would I risk my future and the career I love for Luo Chuan? He's not that important to me."